The cream cheese

The cream cheese   bandit may have been apprehended by his purloining the small Philadelphia bar but the petty thefttarnished his reputation. At first blush, a gang of Fagan on linethieves would…. we daresay leave a lasting scar, forcing him toingratiate his neurons, living with his guilt.

You’ve been caught with your pants down, nabbed by … not bycyber space technology nor metrics, but by mirrored ceilings, sneaking a peak into your check mated soul.

                                                                                      II

A nickel and dime bandit caught…thinking he could beat the system. Didn’t his kid brother pay the price of opening the side door at the Forum theater on West Pico Boulevard and South North, while attending Mount Vernon Junior High  on South Norton and Venice Boulevard. 7th grade (A 7)

He thought with the aid of Alan B. he could open the theaterside door without being nabbed by the usher. He confessedunlike Fyodor Dostoyevsky to the manager about committing a sin, without a ticket stub to prove that his amigo Alan had paid his way for under twelve year old demographics.

“So help me God, I swear on a stack of Bibles, I’ll nunca never do it again, sir.”

“A slap on the wrist this time. You’re not a part of Fagan’s gang, out of Oliver Twist’s London Paddington. Even if you identified with Oliver , you can’t b eat the system, Hubsy.  Now beat it scat, go back to your mother’s digs. Keep your nose clean, Hubsy.”

A slap on the wrist by an adult . A  surrogate father like his own Name Detective pops... ……….36 years in solitary confinement at the s Surrogates Court, Court and Montague Street, downtown Brooklyn.

                                                                                     III

The Forum marquee screening “The postman always rings twice” playing at the time of the kid brother being captured  for his  naughty naught, opening the side door for an unpaidadmission..

That there was a moral providence. Invisible as it may seem;that they didn’t teach you at Mt. Vernon Junior High on South Norton. Nor put in the syllabus at UCLA (Politics, Dr. Titus with Machiavelli, Halderman and Erlichman in attendance, pre  President Nixon’s wired White House)

“The postman always rings twice”, starring Lana Turner and John Garfield (Julie Garfinkel)  ”kisses with dreams in them” Julie said, as the two mimicked the wasting of Cecil Kellaway, Lana Turner’s surrogate hubby, owner of the  Pacific Coast Highway diner they shared.. 

“Kisses with dreams in them ,” the car crashing  on the wave pummeling rocks below,  overwhelming  Cecil Kellaway’s mortal being in the trunk.

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September 29, 2014. The City that never sleeps  

The year 1921 when the Babe arrived at the House that Ruth built

Whether it was the year 1921 when the Babe arrived at the House that Ruth built or the year 1940 when “Leo the Lip”Durocher ( a St. Louis Gashouse Gang shortstop). arrived atEbbets Field, saying “Nice guys finish last”

                                                                                       II

For our brainy  readers may your ex knothole kid throw into your considered  cyber space orbit, a better hitting and fielding short stop  on the planet…

“Born to be a Yankee”

                                                                                   III                                          

“How does it feel after 20 years playing shortstop. To take off the pinstripes for the last time?” 

                                       

“I’ll be honest with you,” said the 40 year old El Capitan ,taking a heroic stance, playing his last game for the Yankees: adream stretching from the age of three, playing for the  pin stripes of Ruth, in the Bronx.…  

”I’ m the luckiest man o n the face of this Earth,” said Lou Gehrig…… Joe DiMaggio and the 54 hitting steak, Mickey Mantle, Roger Maris’s 61 homers into the future and  maestrofather figure  Joe Torre’s  5 World Championships since.…..

                                                                                    IV

The love pouring out from the fans as el Capitan, with hisJeterian swing, hit the game winning run, with man  on second.The Orioles tying the game  with a homer, top of the 9th..

No words could ascribe Frank Capra’s “It’s a wonderful life”. Or“Mister Jeterr, we’ve been waiting or you,” said the High Llama at 125 years old, waiting g for the Captain  to arrive at the Hall of Fame (Shangri-la) in Capra’s ”Lost Horizon”.

                                                                             V

Where could Ted Williams …two wars, have a heroic stance like Jeter’s…Stan  the Man Musial with his harmonica….Willie Mays as the “Say hay kid” with the Giants? Hank Aaron and hisepic record of four baggers.

Jackie Robinson  breaking the color line……Derek Jeter passing Roger Wagner in hits….in  the immortal orbit of Ty Cobb, PeteRose, “Tri” Speaker….

In our lifetime…….the  miracle of the dream fades out at Red Sox’s Boston, the Captain’s moisture over his eyes (“I’ll be honest with you”), tipping his cap to those humans called fanswho love him : not at all ashamed for Leo the Lip’s cynicism  

“Nice guys finish first”.

September 25, 2014 Yankee Stadium, last game in pin stripes forCaptain  and shortstop Derek Jeter ‘s #2

The cream cheese bandit sweating out his cyber space

The cream cheese bandit sweating out his  cyber space sins andno phone ding a ling apps via the Palm Springs tennis tourney, hoping to get a renewal of his youthful aggressions….”if in doubt call it out”   driving his Dune Buggy  thru Rancho Mirage toward  29 Palms and   Joshua Tree Jimmy Cagney’s museumand  Pinto Mountain.

                                                                                    II

It seemed as though it was only 24 hours ago in his yesterdays:his kid brother buying ten acres of the Mojave Desert The plumbing  constituted water pipes, electrical lines overhead, andGunga Din dunes  everywhere.

H gave 5 acres in Desert Hot springs to his older brother, the brunt of his bullying: the sadistic aftermath of the Columbia Midshipman’s debacle ,his flunking out “retardation”, his parents, the Name Detective and his “What’s in a name?” mother, used to characterize that period of depression in their first son’s  birthright..he driving his  Dine Buggy thru the dunes, his mind on the Marine Base as  far as his aging eyes could see.

Of course, he wasn’t obsessed with the “Star is born” celeb addiction like his kid bro. He had his own demonic addiction. You weren’t ID’d  the “the cream cheese bandit” for nothing!

                                                                                    III

He made a U turn, the Sand Buggy groveling like the big crowds screaming their lungs out as the once hot rod throttles booming, the cars like salmon shooting  the rapids : screaming exhausts, as the drivers hit the throttles, the race car circuit thrilling the  patrons. Identifying vicariously with the sound and fury..

A euphoric gung ho Gunga Din  …. Van Nuys Air National Guard, George AF Base, Norton, March, San Bernardino AFB….. As he remembered the tides he and his kid brother had, sharing space in the Air Force bases outside Dusty Acres ,stashed away in the Mojave. And San Fernando Valley..

                                                                                     IV

The cream cheese bandit forgot about the mirrors in the Safeway market ceiling, as he put the Philadelphia cream cheese packet,in the pocket of his Arm y Navy foul weather jacket, his kid brother bought for him,  to protect against the City of Angelsdewy nights.

How could he live down his bullying rep.. The fastest 6th grader at Booty Junior High. The leading role of President GeorgeWashington in the Senior play. The first tennis team Capitan  at Tilden  High School….  a half scholarship in the same role at Long Island University L.I.U.’s basketball heaven, coach and athletic director Clair Bee: Picareeli , (“Pic) his loyal alter ego at the DeKalb Avenue, Brooklyn sidewalk campus..

                                                                                   V

A “Star is b orn”, Janet Gaynor. Fredric March…Charlie Farrell, Jack L. Warner’s contemporary: playing doubles and the acting game, the President of the Palm Springs Racquet club…. to be seen with these  clean cut celebs and tennis immortals.

Not Sampras and Agassi. Nor Steffi Gray. Or controlled power”Pancho” Gonales, “Pancho” Segura, Jack Kramer, Ted Schroeder, Ted Olewine…. Upland’s Davenport…Ivan. Lendl,Martina Navratilova from Czechoslovakia, Stefan Edberg from Sweden, Chrissie Evert, McEnroe, his kid bro….Billie JeanKing, Arthur Ashe, Jimmy Connors, Herby Flam, Gene Garret, , Boris Becker, all following in the dream stuff of Janet Gaynor’sa “Star is born” the   original with Frederic March as her discoverer, actor Norman Maine.                                                                                                                

                                                                                  VI

Judy Garland’s subsequent words on the planet “ Hello everybody. This his Mrs. Norman Maine”, her alcoholic husband …,James Mason as Norman Maine, his dissipation into“drink”, diving  into the Pacific waves and eternity. 1954.

His wife identifying with Moss Hart’s  “ Hello everybody. This is Mrs. Norman Maine” a   curtain call, in more ways than one.

                                                                                     VI

The Cream Cheese Bandit” hardly knew what was playing out as he gazed upon all these stars in their own racquet and racketorbits...

Janet Gaynor arm in arm with her agent hubby. The silvery  hairtall handsome Charlie Farrell and  Racquet Club president,former Mayor of the status oriented community.

Where was Frederic March a 1937 Norman Maine ? Didn’t he once identify with the  binge driven obsession of the  leading man’s  down loaded stupor. 
   

                                                                                     VII

On his Dune Buggy, driving back into his Mulholland Drivemile high digs, the cream cheese bandit, his foul weather jacketon, with the Philadelphia cream cheese caper in mind, may have finally realized the error of his ways. That moral providence was playing out. But how could he know for sure.

He drove the Dune Buggy into his driveway a mile high above the San Fernando Valley denizens and natives, living out their dreams below.

Not knowing  Aldo Ray, a former North Dakota deputy sheriff was  in the hills, searching for a drive way where he could park his station wagon overnight…. winding down  from his screen test for former Van Nuys Air National Guard Sergeant Jack Nicholson’s  “One flew over the cuckoo’s nest”

September 20, 2014.   The city that never sleeps